Remember How I Finished Nursing School?

That was over a month ago.  Remember how I was supposed to spend all my free time studying for the NCLEX?  Remember how I was gonna ACE it?  Yeah, well, I'm looking at the test just a few weeks away... and I haven't even started preparing.  I'm an idiot.

Time to do some questions.  God!!

Cee In Training

I've been working out. I'm not really seeing the results I want, but hell… I gotta do it. Monday and Friday mornings I work with a trainer. She's good. She makes me feel sore for the next 24 hours. We do a lot of work on my arms, butt and trunk/abs. It's like the total chick-needs workout. We do some cardio, like the treadmill or the bike or jumping on that half ball thing.

Wednesday I'm with a guy I don't know to well, but he seems like he knows what he's doing. It's better when the trainer knows you better. I think my morning trainer has a better feel for my capabilities and needs. Thursday, I work with the owner of the gym. He's good. You can just tell. He pushes me. Maybe it's a little too much because my body gives up. But is that what he's supposed to do? I really have no clue.

My cousin, J (from our poor attempt at bootcamp) entered us in a radio contest. Now, I have satellite radio, so apart from Opie & Anthony and Cosmo Radio (nice combo, huh?) I don't really delve much into the on-air world. Needless to say, I had never heard of the station, let alone the competition that J was interested in. Basically, it's a take on 'The Biggest Loser' where three teams of four are each assigned to local gyms, given trainers and compete against each other. Six weeks of free personal training, after two years of eating out of a vending machine during nursing school? Uh, yes. Sign me up.

I still don't know what the prize is. And I don't care. I have six weeks (I'm in week 5 now) of training for free. Final weigh-in and measurements are next week. The scale isn't making me happy, but I do feel toned. The fact that I'm not losing weight sucks because I had zero problem putting on 19lbs since Aug 2009. Hi, I'm fat.

On nursing school and adult diapers

As a girl growing up in the suburbs with a stable family and never really going without, there are certain inevitabilities in life. You expect you'll go to college, you'll get too drunk and throw up. You'll clean up after a roommate. You'll have kids and change diapers. You'll get a dog who will poop on your carpet. Maybe you'll be a bartender and have to clean up after your college lacrosse team after a "fundraiser" gone awry.

I've recently completed my first full year of nursing school (by the skin of my teeth, but nonetheless), and finally have a minute (when I'm not studying for Pharmacology) to reflect on what I've been through so far.  Nursing school is hard.  And it kinda sucks.  I've never worked harder at anything in my life.  It makes me feel stupid.  But, everyone feels the same way.  So, we push on through.  Clinical rotations, however, are amazing.  For 8 hours a week, I play nurse in bright white (increasingly tighter) scrubs.

One thing that former-marketing-major-I-want-to-wear-a-power-suit chick would never have expected to be doing at 8AM on a Sunday morning - changing the adult diaper in a nursing home of a man I've never met before.

In theory, yes, it's kinda gross. In practice, however, it's much, much worse. Poop smells. Plus, you have to figure that someone who is incontinent and cannot clean himself, may have some other physical difficulties. Like, laying on his side. It took three of us to perform a bed bath on this man. Two to hold and one to clean. He wasn't a large man, but he was very stiff. He has osteoporosis and some other issues that make it painful and difficult to remain in that position.

And, while it is a shock - physically - to have to provide such a steep level of care for someone, it's really the emotion of it that's gotten to me. I can't imagine what it must be like to see a crew of 20-somethings in scrubs swarm in to wipe my butt.... To know that my whole life has already happened.

I guess this is why they start us in a long-term care facility. We're seeing people who have contributed so much for so many years. They deserve the best care.

I have finished my nursing home rotation, but each session was a challenge. The first two times, I was paired up with total-care patients who could do very little for themselves. The first week, the man I was caring for could barely speak. He was very weak, had a rough night's sleep and was fighting a pneumonia infection. The next time, I was caring for a man in a similar physical state, who was mentally aware. That was more difficult. He was so aware of what was going on and the fact that he couldn't help. He was also the man who needed the assistance of three nursing students.

In my third shift, I was assigned to a woman. She is in her mid 90's and has been diagnosed with dimentia. Physically, she's awesome, considering her age. And, she's a little hard of hearing, but mentally, she really seemed to be totally with it. She required some assistance. I had to wash her.... only after she stripped naked in the bathroom...without warning.. Which was a shock, since I had no clothes or towels ready for her... But, she was totally lucid and able to do much of her hygiene care herself. It wasn't until she said, while adjusting her bra "help me lift 'em in there" that I snapped back into the situation...

What keeps some people bed-ridden and others stripping in the bathroom? It's an incredible learning experience. In the lab, you get the techniques down. But in practice, you're not dealing with steps, you're dealing with people. I think some of the CNAs forget that sometimes. I know I'm green here, but I hope not to forget that. And, while we're at it, I hope no one ever has to "lift 'em in there" for me... whether I'm able to ask for it or not.

Turn Your Head and Cough

Well. It's official. I just opened my Amazon package containing my TEAS study guide. The TEAS is way less fun that the name suggests. It's the nursing school entrance exam. It tests you on some weird crap. Apparently, it's mostly a general aptitude test that includes reading comprehension, language, math and basic science. But, I've run across some practice questions that are just ridiculous. But, whatever. I've gotta do it.

I am often asked about what brought this major career switch to the forefront. I'm currently in marketing. I always assumed I'd have an MBA before I turned 30. I'm 27 and I have zero desire to continue on in the corporate office environment. I feel it's slowly killing me. And, I like my current job.

The school I went to required six months of classroom study and six months of internships each year. So, upon graduating I had about two years of office experience. (Part of that was spent bartending, but we don't talk about that.) During that time I did have some beneficial experiences as well. I spent six months at an advertising agency in downtown boston and six months at a major media company. Working at the giant company as a menial peon made me angry. I guess I think I'm important. I don't like office politics. I don't kiss ass. I don't call my co-workers "Mr." or "Ms." because it's ridiculous.

I don't like that at the end of the day, leaving the office, I felt like I had no impact in anything. I don't like that I worked there fore $8 an hour, while the ads and programs I scheduled made billions for the C-level staff.

After college, I changed my focus. Instead of running to the nearest ad agency or media company, I chose to work for a national charitable organization doing PR and marketing. But guess what. A desk's a desk. Shortly after starting, I realized that I was wasting my early 20's sitting in front of a computer, teaching others how to use Excel, and walking on eggshells. I was given constant "professional development" advice from some people who had the worst business sense and ass-kissery I'd ever encountered. I was told I couldn't speak directly to my SVP. What?

While my press releases and instruction manuals did, eventually, lead down a long windy road that resulted in providing charitable aid to people, it was difficult to "feel" that I was having an impact. And, with that missing, I learned that that's what I was craving.

It's funny. I went to a great school for careers in the healthcare sector. Of course, I had no interest in that back then. Now, I'm rushing around, going to night school at a community college to obtain the necessary prerequisites for entry into one of several mediocre Associates degree programs that cater to evening and weekend schedule needs. All in all, it's going to take me longer to complete an AS than it did to complete my BS plus two years of internships.

Regardless of how much effort it will take, I am happy to be doing some hard work in a totally foreign field to achieve an actual goal. Plus, I get to wear a white lab coat.